An In Depth Analysis Of A Pseudo-Feminist Screed ‘Too’ Stupid To Believe

     Ladies and gentlemen of the internet, I’ve been accused of many things during my time writing here at Eyeball Circus.  Being too good at lovemaking.  Having fists far too dangerous to be out in public.  Getting Glenn Beck’s mom pregnant on 19 different occasions.  I’ve had all manner of horrible and completely true indictments carelessly hurled at me.  Additionally, you could say that I’ve been flippant in the past about describing something as ‘the stupidest thing I’ve ever read’.  Well, all that ends today.  I’d like to present you with a line-by-line analysis of what is, without question, the most batshit insane, ill-reasoned, stupid fucking thing I’ve ever read.  Enter this article titled “The 3 Letter Word That Cuts Women Down Every Day” by a young woman named Cameron Schaeffer.  In the interest of not spoiling the adventure we’re about to embark on together, let’s just jump right in.  Her words are in italics, my responses are normal.  She begins: Continue reading

100 Reasons It’s Great To Be A Guy (Part 2)

     Last week at Eyeball Circus, I talked about this stupid list of 100 reasons it’s great to be a guy written by some idiot sitting in a cloud of his own farts.  I’ve already covered the first 50 items on the aforementioned list (which you can read here), and now I’d like to go through 51 through 100.  As you’ll soon see, the author of this list was almost certainly fed high yield insecticide instead of baby formula when he was an infant, and this sad fact really shines through in his writing.  Let’s begin: Continue reading

100 Reasons It’s Great To Be A Guy (Part 1)

     For centuries, the idiots of the world have pondered the best things about being a guy.  Is it the ample selection of jock itch sprays?  Is it the way we look terrible in button down shirts?  Is it the fact that when women want to take down an evil organization they’re Erin Brockovich, and when men do it they dip their hands in broken glass and kick Asian men to death? Continue reading